No you don’t have OCD just because you like your house clean

Sunday, May 21st, 2017

So when the sales guy was at my house showing me the Kirby doing a demonstration, he told me he was OCD. I asked him if he had that diagnoses and he said he has never gotten one before. I then didn’t believe he had it because lot of people think they have it just because they like things a certain way or in order or because they are stuck on a topic and spend hours with it researching it and reading about it and can’t stop.

I wanted to tell him that OCD is not really having a clean house and needing it all clean and asking him if he actually likes needing to have a clean house. from my understanding people with OCD do not like wanting to have a clean house but they can’t stop it because of bad thoughts and thinking something bad will happen. I can’t even relate to that and that doesn’t even describe me. But yet if someone likes their house to be very clean, everyone thinks that person is OCD. No they are not unless there is anxiety behind it and they get distressed about the need to want their house to be neat and there has to be fear behind it. It’s too bad how doctors and everyone will be quick to say someone has OCD without looking behind the symptoms first to see if it’s truly OCD. Now I wonder if I had been misdiagnosed with it because no one had ever talked to me about why I wanted the house clean. I just don’t like messes. No I am not scared of them, I just don’t like messes. No I am not scared of dirt or germs. No I am not afraid of our house getting roamed with termites or having rodents come in or thinking our house will fall down if it’s not clean. No I do not get anxiety as I am cleaning.

I often hear online how people will say they are OCD about their house or OCD about something or say how it makes their OCD crazy when something isn’t even. People with real OCD get annoyed with that stuff. Occasionally I will see someone come to the OCD forum on Reddit and ask about their “compulsion” and they are just talking about being fixated on a topic and how they can’t stop researching it and learning everything about it and thinking about it and I think “that’s isn’t OCD, that is a symptoms of autism.” But my mom would call it OCD because she thinks they’re both the same but have different labels. But at least one person will point out to them to the Asperger’s forum on Reddit and tell the OP they are leaning towards autism about their obsession.

But that was my first time ever seeing someone saying they are OCD because they are also clean. Even Jerry did the same thing but it was about organization and because I wasn’t organized enough for him, I wasn’t OCD so therefore the doctors were wrong. Maybe they were. So was my ex because OCD isn’t liking things organized and people with OCD would get anxiety from wanting things organized and not get pleasure out of it or feel calm about it and there would be worry behind it and anxiety behind it and it would drive them crazy needing things to be organized and they can’t stop even though they want to. It certainly didn’t drive him crazy wanting things in order and he liked it. There was no fear behind it or anxiety and no “Oh no it’s the end of the world because my soup can is in the wrong spot, oh no, I’m dead. Now I have to make sure nothing bad will happen after it’s been in the wrong spot because my girlfriend didn’t know how to put it back when she was snooping.” Now that’s OCD and lot of OCDers don’t have that compulsion and that is why it’s a stereotype because most people think of organization and liking things even and in order and being neat when they hear the word OCD and they may also picture excessive hand washing and excessive checking things and fear of germs. Monk was a stereotype of it because he feared dirt so he always had to wipe his hands after shaking hands. Then there was As Good As It Gets and Jack Nicholson in it couldn’t step on any cracks and he feared germs so he wore gloves and couldn’t use the same bar of soap. But other things he did did seem to lean towards autism like the need to sit in a certain spot in a restaurant and being upset about his usual waitress not being there. Some people believe he was misdiagnosed as having OCD so they view him as an aspie.

I remember another funny story. I was seeing my school counselor one time when I was 15 and it was during school. I had my Game Boy Color with me and he said I was doing OCD and I asked him why and he said I keep on taking off the battery cover because I keep thinking it’s not on right and I want to be sure it’s on right and I keep thinking it’s not so I have to keep checking. I told him that was not why I was doing it and I know it’s on right and I am just taking it off because I am and putting it back on. So he gets up and takes the system out of my hand and sits back down and I start to play with my fingers and he goes “Oh I see, I took this away and now you are twisting your fingers.” He then said he took it away so he could see what I do and he saw I will just go to my fingers. It was not about the battery cover and I am just someone who will play with things in her hand and if I have nothing, I play with my fingers.

So people just make assumptions when they see a behavior and assume it’s OCD. Thoughts get stuck in your head, oh that must be OCD. You keep getting distracted by thoughts, oh that’s OCD. My question to those accusations would be “is there any anxiety behind it?” “Are they bad thoughts or happy thoughts?” “Do they give the person distress?” If not, it’s not OCD. Someone even asked on Wrongplanet about listening to the same song over and over OCD and I said it was not if it’s not giving them distress. If they are doing it because they enjoy it, it’s not OCD. I have even seen people say online about songs being stuck in your head OCD. Unless it gives them distress, then it is.

I got a Kirby

Saturday, May 20th, 2017

I learned that Kirby got its name after the person who invented the vacuum. I always thought it was called Kirby because it sucks in a lot of dirt. The person who was selling it to me said he thought the same too and I mentioned that Nintendo character and no wonder it got its name because he sucks in enemies and other things.

They had a special going on about the vacuum and today it was Kirby’s anniversary the day it was invented so they did a extra special so I got an extra discount. The whole thing took us two hours to do because they came 40 minutes before I had to leave to get my son and I thought they were only going to clean a room because that is what they said but instead it was the whole Kirby demonstration thing and I had to watch it first. then I had my husband take over when I got my son from school and I took over again and then my husband took over when I had to leave for work. Then they came back today and finished the rest of their demonstration and it took us about three hours and the seller said I was a very good listener because I was learning fast and lot of people don’t learn that quickly because they don’t listen. It’s too much to take in because of lot of talking. My kids enjoyed the vacuum so they are going to be excited to see it when they get home. I plan on doing the stairs tomorrow.

They didn’t keep their promise of cleaning our couches in the living room because they were too dirty they said and they told me to watch the DVD and vacuum the couches thoroughly and then shampoo them. So I did that and they look cleaner.

I had fun with my new toy so I vacuumed the couches and cleaned the seat cushions and the arms. Then I vacuumed my son’s room and cleaned our bedroom and vacuumed the rug and moved the couch and chair and vacuumed. Then I went outside and cut the grass but I had my husband help me start it and then I put the broken branches in the white truck and the small ones in the compost bin and I mowed the front lawn and then picked up some garbage on our patio and threw it away and put some stuff up in the attic and my own stuff and. I also got the house organized by cleaning out our drawers in the living room and dining room and I organized everything and I put all the pens and pencils in a baggy and I found a bunch of batteries and put them in one baggy. I did what my grandma Doe used to do. I also found my mom’s Costco membership card. I also found my son’s library book that was over do so I stuck it on the kitchen counter for him to take to school the following day. Now we don’t have to pay to replace it. I also found my husband’s medical bill and put it on his computer chair and I found our credit card bill for June so I put it down there too on his chair. I hate it when my father opens our mail and doesn’t tell us about it and he just tosses it into a pile with other junk. Then we don’t know about it so we never see the bills come or anything else important. My parents don’t want to go all the way to the basement to drop mail off down there like I do and I put it where my husband can see it. I put my parents mail on the kitchen counter because I know they will look when they see it there.  But yet they won’t do the same for us, they won’t leave it at my computer. I also tossed out a bunch of papers that were junk and I put all the photos in the bottom drawer and tossed out the empty CD cases and my dad wasn’t here to save stuff he thinks it’s worth keeping so it was my chance to get rid of stuff without him prying in. He is out of town with Mom for a few days because my brother is graduating.

I also found my dad’s medals and put them in his room and I put all the scissors and scotch tape and glue sticks together in the top drawer with the pens and pencils and batteries and stuff I tossed in a sack for Goodwill. I also found a flashlight, my son’s pencil sharpener, stapler, staples, bunch of screws so I stuck them in one baggy. I also found old camera film, ear buds that never been opened. you find interesting things when cleaning.

Boy I love cleaning but getting started is the hardest because it takes motivation but once I start, I can’t stop so I basically cleaned all day.

Did Karen Brewer have anxiety?

Monday, May 15th, 2017

I remember when I was a kid, I always read Baby Sitters Little Sister books and the first book I read was Karen’s School Bus and I felt I related to it because she would get bullied on the bus like I did. I sometimes related to her because like me she was also bossy and she was also loud so she had to be reminded to use a inside voice. Plus she didn’t have many friends, only two. The rest were just acquaintances.

But it dawned on me that Karen might also have anxiety because she was always saying in the books she got butterflies in her stomach. Did she have social anxiety? I don’t know but she always got nervous she would get sick to her stomach. I always took Butterflies in her stomach literal thinking she had actual butterflies in there.

Ann M Martin had always put some interesting characters in her story. Claudia had dyslexia possibly, it was obvious she had a learning disability because she wasn’t good with spelling. Jackie Rodowsky possibly had dyspraxia because he was always bumping into things and tripping and Ann M Martin once had another client child Kristy and her friends baby sat being recently diagnosed with dyslexia so he was putting himself down saying he was stupid. Plus there was another character I forget his name but he was profoundly deaf so everyone spoke sign language and the other kids were learning it too. Ann M Martin once even put an autistic character in one of her books and her name was Susan but she only appeared in one book and so did Whitney who had Down syndrome but she has been mentioned in the other Baby Siters Club book series and she did appear once in one of the Baby Sitter Club special books. Ann M Martin had never put any socially awkward characters in her book series making them nerdy with strong interests and being socially retarded where they don’t get hints and understand social cues. if she did, then we would all be speculating that character had Asperger’s. Karen Brewer was obviously gifted because she skipped a grade so she was very bright so her IQ might be above average. But she was a good reader and speller too. Now I am thinking she probably had anxiety since she was always anxious but it didn’t affect her and her functioning. It wouldn’t mean she had an anxiety disorder. Some people can be more anxious than others but it wouldn’t mean they have an anxiety disorder unless it’s impacting their life and giving them road blocks like it keeps them from making appointments or doing well on a test or studying or they can’t even order their own food or even go to a restaurant and eat out or even go to places because of people they would have to deal with and they need everyone to do it for them. That was not Karen. She would get butterflies but she still dealt with it and carried on. But yet there are people out there who still take pills for their anxiety even though it doesn’t stop them but it helps with their psychical symptoms so they won’t have to deal with it all the time like heart burns or nausea or feeling like they are having a heart attack or short of breath, etc. Does it mean they have an anxiety disorder, I don’t know since it doesn’t stop them from doing anything because they just deal with those psychical symptoms. But now there is medicine for it so they can just take that. I only view anxiety as a disability if it stops you from living a normal life and it makes it hard for you to function because it affects your thinking and behavior and your functioning and your learning rather than just having psychical symptoms.

There seems to be so many bad drivers lately

Saturday, May 13th, 2017

First I have been hearing honking on the road and I never assume it’s directed at me because I am going the speed and I am not cutting anyone off and I always look before switching lanes.

Then one day I am going to pick my son up from school so I am driving through the neighborhood going about 15-20 mph (it’s 20 in school zones when children are present or when the lights are flashing or on school days from 7AM till 5 PM in my state, it all varies) and I hear shouting from a mother who is standing right outside her car and she had her back door open and then I notice she is waving but too late I drive by her and I look in the rear view mirror and she is looking my direction and it looked like she flipped me off. I thought it was all strange because I wasn’t speeding and I didn’t nearly hit her so what was the screaming about?

Then today I was going to McDonalds with my family and I was driving my car and I had a truck tailgating behind me and I just keep on driving the speed and then I turn on my signal and I slow down and then the truck behind me honks as I am going into the middle lane to turn and I am like “what’s his problem” and my husband told me he almost hit me and I said “he was tailgating me and I had my signal on” and he said he knows so that was why he got upset. Hopefully that driver learned a lesson. DO. NOT. TAILGATE.

I have just been hearing so many honkings lately and I don’t know if it’s just a coincidence or a confirmation bias or if I have just gotten more aware of bad drivers out there. But sometimes I feel like a bad driver myself but everyone tells me I am a good driver. I sometimes forget to use my turn signal and I have nearly hitten pedestrians a couple times while leaving my own driveway because I don’t see them because of the bushes being in the way and one time I was turning and it was dark out and I saw a guy all of a sudden because I didn’t see him but luckily he got out of the way and I slammed on my breaks because it was really dark in that intersection because of no lights and I wondered if I was going too fast and that I maybe didn’t look hard enough when I was turning. I also wondered if I forgot to have my signal on but I wasn’t sure because it was off and it always turns itself off after I make the turn. And missing speed limit signs, I have done that before or not paying attention to my speedometer because I would forget to look at it to see how fast I am going and when I have looked at it, I would see I was going too slow or too fast so I slow down or speed up unless there is traffic in front of me or if it’s wet out, I stay below the speed. I will not tailgate. I sometimes wonder if I am one of those bad drivers but I have never honked my horn because I don’t react quick enough to even do it. But yet when I went to the class today for photo safety class, we were all told by the officer there we were all good drivers and we all make mistakes and even he makes mistakes. He also said if we were a bad driver, we wouldn’t be there. he also explained that lot of people think they do this all for money and the laws are out to get them but they are there to protect us and he told us the money we give them for the class goes towards the class and providing it, they don’t want our money, they just want everyone to be safe on the roads. The reason why they take our money is because that is how people listen and being told to not do that again, they don’t respond to it but they do with money being taken from them. They also go around doing photo radar to catch speeders when they have gotten complaints from residents and they have cameras at intersections where there have been lot of collisions so they can catch people running through a red light. We were also told about running a yellow light and some people will actually speed up or try and make the light before it turns red when it means to slow down because it’s turning and if anyone says they got a ticket for going through a yellow light tell them it’s not possible because the cameras go on when the light is red.

I have gotten a flash at an intersection when I went through a yellow light because by the time I would have done a complete stop, I would have been in the middle of the intersection and it would have been dangerous so I kept on going and I saw a flash and no ticket ever came in the mail. The officer did explain that they won’t issue a ticket if they see it would have been dangerous if you stopped, they view the footage to see if a ticket is warranted. I actually learned interesting things in that class like how when we focus on one thing, our eyes will not notice other details so they did a test with all of us by having us stare at a green dot on the screen and the yellow dots disappeared. We were told they were there the whole time but it’s just the way our brains work. We tune out the other details when focusing on one detail. Then we were told to look at the screen again but this time look at all the dots. We did and they all stayed and we were told it’s the same screen. I already knew driving is multitasking because not only do you need to watch the road, you need to watch the car in front of you for if they break and also look on the side of the road for signs and also when coming past a street, look for cars as you are driving up to it and if you see a car, make sure they are stopping and I already knew that when coming up to a light, watch the light and the cars in front of you.

Even as a pedestrian you gotta watch for traffic because you have to make sure people notice you so you won’t get hit by a car and to stay off the road and if you see a car leaving their driveway, make sure they are stopping because they might not even notice you. Even when crossing a crosswalk, you still have to make sure cars are stopping.

Driving can seem stressful and I got talked out of going down to Chicago when I went to Wisconsin a couple years ago because of too many people and people go fast on the roads and my mom said it would be too stressful. I heard officers there pull you over if you go the speed limit but yet here you get a ticket for going with the flow of traffic. I learned in class that if you got a ticket because you were going with the flow of traffic, then the whole flow will be getting a ticket. But yet I hear in California, you get pulled over for going the speed limit. It’s gets so confusing about when to go with the flow or when to follow the speed. At least in my area you are to go the speed, not with the flow.

I was in the car one time with my mother and we were leaving a Goodwill parking lot and this car in front of us pulls out onto the road but she stops and then goes and my mom is saying ‘Just go lady” and  I notice the side of her car had been rear ended and my mom says “she is a bad drive, no wonder the side of her car is smashed up” and I said in her defense “maybe she is just nervous because of so many cars and she doesn’t want to get in a wreck” and my mom said “She apparently already has.” But I have done the same thing that lady has done because where there are a lot of cars and it’s backed up and the light is red, it’s hard for me to see incoming traffic on the other side of the road because of all the cars blocking it that are going the opposite direction. That is why I use the center lane but how do I know there is a car coming in the center lane? I do feel like a bad driver when I am trying to be a safe driver like today I was waiting to pull into McDonalds and the incoming car stopped and I start to move slowly and my husband told me to just go but I saw other cars coming so I stopped and pulled back into the center lane an my husband told me I could have just gone. I told him I couldn’t see cars coming and no way am I getting into a car wreck. If a incoming car had stopped in the other lane too, then I would have gone. Sometimes I think being a safe driver makes one a bad driver which is ironic.

 

My dad got scammed

Sunday, May 7th, 2017

You know how someone will call you claiming to be calling from Microsoft and say your computer has been sending out viruses or they have gotten a report that your computer has a virus and they even ask for your name when they call. It’s like magic because your name appears when they look up random phone numbers to call. Now they are sending out emails with a toll free number. My dad got one of those so he spent a few hours on the phone with them and I got a feeling it was a scam because I wondered if they called hi or if he called them and the fact they wouldn’t let him hang up when he said his phone was dying so he would need to switch to the house phone. I thought about just grabbing the phone from him and hanging up but what if he was talking to the legitimate computer company? I also had a bunch of questions to ask him but because he gets snarly and testy and gets mad when you try talking to him, I didn’t bother. I told my mom instead about my worries because I thought this could affect her but she said he was using his business account so it won’t affect our income and her whole income pays for our house and bills and my dad’s income goes towards my brother to pay for his housing until he finishes school. I asked if it would affect my brother and she said my dad’s Social Security goes towards my brother’s income so my brother won’t be affected by my dad’s mistake, only his business will. She told me this will be a lesson for him to learn because she has kept telling him to not do youtube on his work computer and other things but he gets testy with her and she even told him to buy a new computer for personal use and he got testy too.

My dad had been having problems with his computer and finally he got an email from the “company” saying his computer has viruses and give them a call at their toll free number. Instead of just waiting to take it in on Monday, he tries to get this all done today so he can work and while they did fix the problem, he can’t open his files now. Also he said they were scamming him and I wondered why did he still talk to them and didn’t hang up and why did he still give them his card number?

Also when he went to see his friend who was checking out a condo nearby, he told him he thinks it’s a scam and my dad came home and called his bank to cancel his credit card to get a new one and to block the payments from that company.

I wish I still just hung up on him but then there would have been a big fight and an argument and dealing with my dad’s temper. But it wasn’t my problem and with an attitude he has, why would I want to tell him it was possibly a scam and Windows and Microsoft don’t go around calling people and he should look up to see if any email scams exist about computers?

At least I’m not married to someone like him. That would be too stressful. Someone who doesn’t listen and makes these mistakes when they’re avoidable. My mom has learned to walk away and she said it stresses her out too. I don’t know how she deals with it without having a breakdown or having anxiety impair her because of all the stress. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it.

Oh well just let it be a lesson for him.

For a moment I thought I was Crazy

Thursday, May 4th, 2017

I decided to mail off my Gamefly game so I drop it in our mailbox to find yesterday’s mail in there. I take it out and one of them is addressed to me from the city. I open it when i got inside and it was a traffic violation of speeding. What I don’t speed, I always go the speed limit. Maybe it’s possible I wasn’t paying attention to my speedometer or it’s possible I was going the wrong speed on the road and didn’t slow down soon enough or I thought a road was a certain speed but didn’t know it was the different speed. Mistakes happen. I start reading the paper and then trying to figure out how do I pay the fine. then I see a flyer about taking the photo safety class so I didn’t know if I had to take that class or pay the ticket, which is it. So I see the ticket finally and it said I sped through a school zone. Okay I do forget often to slow down at the school near me because you only go 20 when the lights flash and I am not used to driving through there during school hours and when i take my son to school, the lights are never flashing and they only do on Mondays because of late start. So I have a habit of going the speed limit and it’s other cars that remind me to slow down because they are going slow so I slow down. But sometimes there are no other cars so I am not reminded and then it’s too late. So I thought maybe that is what the ticket is for but wait it said it happened at noon. i don’t drive through the school zone at noon because I am always home and I go to my workout at that time and I don’t go that direction. This has to be a mistake but yet there is a photo of me driving so how is this possible?

I look at the date and it happened May 1st and that is the day I worked out on. But I didn’t go that way so how did I get the ticket and how is there a photo of me driving? Then I noticed the violation date was April 21st so I look at the calendar again and it was on a Friday. I worked out that day but I didn’t go through a school zone. But are there any school zones on the way to the workout center? It was filed 12:21 PM but I am always in the fitness center at that time so therefore I am not driving at that minute. My car is parked in the paring lot so how is this possible? Is it even possible I was out doing something and I don’t remember or didn’t realize it? What other things do I do I am not aware of and have no memory of? Uh oh this is scary, maybe I should call my doctor and tell them this concern so I can get tested and see what is going on. This is a problem and very scary. But I keep looking at the ticket and I am looking on Googlemaps to see if there are any school zones and then I look at the address again and decide to type it in on Googlemaps and it showed me the road and I noticed a church. I look at the road and I see the 35 MPH sigh. I did go to speed and did they not have up the school speed? I keep looking and I see 20 MPH sign but I was not going that direction because it was towards my house and I was going the opposite way. I decide to look further down the road towards my house and then look the other way to see and then I see the 20 speed sign. I never noticed it before. Now I know to go 20 in that section until I see the 35 sign again. that meant I also wasn’t crazy and I don’t do things I am not aware of.  Also i looked at my ticket again and it said the violation happened at 12:02 PM and I always leave the house at noon so I am in my car at that time. I did my detective work before calling to argue again making myself look stupid and a liar. I also did it before I started panicking about the possibility of having a mental issue of doing things of not being aware of. I did call the number to ask them questions about the classes and the ticket because I didn’t know which was it I had to do. I could do the class and not pay the ticket and it’s cheaper so I decided to do the class and I went to the website to sign up but couldn’t figure it out so I called the number and they helped me figure out how to sign up and I picked a date and signed up and used my savings card to pay. That is what our savings is for, emergencies.

I think someone tried to steal my car

Wednesday, May 3rd, 2017

I had something interesting happened this morning and boy was I lucky. I take my son to school and right when we get to my car, my car door is open and I say ‘What the, I thought I closed it.” So I thought I had it open all this time and now the car battery is dead but instead I find a mess in my car. Someone had been in my glove box and everything was out on the seat, the storage tray between the passenger seats is open and my ash tray and the coin tray and the thing is off where the wires are and it has not been messed with because there is no way to get to the wire. Also trash had been poured out of the bag in the back seat on the floor and they didn’t even clean up after themselves and close the door. I turn the car on and it still ran so nothing was busted and nothing was taken. I thought it was all very weird and my car was parked in the drive way in front of my house and my car is hard to steal it’s not on the list for car thieves. My mom thinks they were looking for cash and I think they were looking for a key and I don’t keep it in my car or any money but coins or anything valuable. Because the fact the battery wasn’t dead told me this didn’t happen too long ago when I went out to my car and something must have scared them off and they were in a  rush so they left it a mess and didn’t close the car door. At the end I just laughed about it because they couldn’t find anything to take and couldn’t hot wire my car. You would basically have to take the front apart to get to the wires. Take the cap off and all you see is a wall with outlets for the DEQ and car dealers and auto mechanics to plug something in to check for anything wrong with your car. And the fact they left my CDs and my game and my 3DS car charger and the cassette tapes and they didn’t take my coins or my Gamestop rewards card. So I think they were just looking for money and looking to take my car. If they couldn’t take it, see if there it a valet or spare key anywhere and see if I keep cash in there. But the fact they had the nerve to come onto our property is weird. That is unusual for car thieves because they don’t target drive ways or cars parked in front of homes.

“That’s cheating.”

Monday, May 1st, 2017

That is what my six year old son said when I told him I used the walkthrough to find all the chests and Korok seeds in Breath of the Wild.  But how is him asking me for help in the game any different than consulting a walkthrough? You’re still getting your answers but because we have internet now, we have no use asking someone for help in the game if you can look it up. I spent most of my time in the game treasure hunting and looting chests and getting Korok seeds to build up my inventory until I maxed them out and I did Shrines to get spirit orbs so I could trade them in to get heart containers and stamina until I maxed that out. I just wanted to be prepared for the final battle and I got over my fear of Guardians and they’re easy now to deal with because I am equipped now. I have good shields and stronger weapons and the master sword and I parry to defeat them. I can’t do that with wooden shield but I can with medal ones that are strong and ancient shields.

 

I know it’s possible to beat Ganon in the castle with three hearts and no armor and no good weapons because there have been videos about it from players doing it but they are so good at playing they can do it without needing any armor and other gear when going to the castle because they get it all there and defeat Ganon without any armor and they do that in a speedrun and plus some people online have said they “accidentally” beat the game when they were exploring the castle and they ended up in the battle room so instead of resetting the game, they decide to beat Ganon and then they are out in the field and then they defeat him again as the beast and bam game ends. My son wants me to get him to the castle but I tell him I can’t do that because he isn’t equipped to go there and he will die from all those guardians and enemies and he doesn’t have the Master Sword and he only has four heats. He isn’t good enough either to do the castle with very little hearts and lack of armor and lack of meals. if I can’t do it, neither could he because he isn’t good at gaming either. But those people who “accidentally” beat the game without doing any four of the dungeons must be good at playing too or they would have died in the castle with very little hearts and armor and items and no Master Sword and strong weapons because the enemies would be too strong and there are a bunch of guardians. I see the game has made this for all levels like for beginners and intermediates and experts players. The experts can do the castle first and beat Ganon so they are able to do the speedrun. Some even manage to explore the castle first before playing the rest of the game and I wonder how they even survive the place so they must be expert players too. I would have been dead from all those beams and enemies with their strong weapons and having lot of health and my weapons would have been too frenzy to defeat them and they would all break before they’re dead. But I am sure some do it later in the game when they have more hearts and stronger weapons and more items and meals and better armor. I waited until I maxed out my weapon and bow and shield stash and max out my meals to do it and I had 24 hearts and had Ancient Armor that was Guardian Resistant but I was missing the head piece so I had the bottoms and the middle but not the top. I waited before I felt equipped to do it. I always like to be prepared for everything because I don’t know how hard it’s going to be.

I wish I could get my son to understand this about why I won’t help him with the castle and why he isn’t equipped for it. I tell him I am not good at it to do it like some people are because I will just die in the castle and so will he. I will even die before I even get there because of so many guardians. I wonder if Nintendo did that on purpose and it was meant to keep players away until they have more armor and weapons and more hearts and stamina but some have managed to get though there with three hearts and no armor and very little weapons. But you can get in the castle through the back by using cryonis to get across the moat to the underground of the castle where the docks are and some have managed to go up the pillars but it’s very difficult to do that because you can’t climb them. But then there are a bunch of skywatchers and guardians at the castle on the outside.

Nintendo Switch

Sunday, April 16th, 2017

My husband decided to get me one for my birthday but it turned out to be a scam because it said it came but it said it was delivered in another state so I had Amazon call us and my husband talked to them and they sent the seller an email and said they would refund us if he didn’t respond in two days. I was then disappointed because my husband had also gotten me a Zelda game and I wouldn’t be able to use it. My husband was so sorry I wouldn’t be getting the system so the following day I was on Reddit and then I see a post saying Nintendo Switch $299.99 Prime only. I click on it and go to the website and they are in stock for preorder so without thinking I preordered it knowing it will be gone quickly if I didn’t act now. I ignored my husband telling me he wanted to get our money back first before buying one. We did get our money back two days later and it cost us $229.00 this time because we saved $70 dollars because we were Prime members. The Switch did come quickly when they came in their warehouse and they shipped it out the same day it came and we got it a day earlier than I expected. So we saved money when we got another Switch because the last one was over $400 dollars and I thought he had bought it from a scalper and my husband didn’t know Amazon had 3rd party sellers. But sadly there are Nintendo Switch scams going around and Amazon is a prime target for it so beware when buying a Switch from sellers. Only buy from Amazon and make sure it’s them selling it, not a 3rd party seller. Also do not buy one that is below retail price. Just be patient and keep an eye out for a Switch.

So the system came and my husband had opened it and set it up for me and I created a profile and started my Zelda game. It’s very different than the other Zelda games because it’s open world and you can do anything in the game and there is no order. Also weapons break so you keep on collecting them and enemies stay dead until the blood moon rises. Instead of collecting heart pieces, you get rupees instead or other items and you only get heart containers from completing shrines to get spirit orbs and you go to a statue to pray and you can trade four orbs for a stamina vessel or a heart container. Also they made the game more realistic. Link uses energy when he climbs or swims, weapons break, Link freezes to death or burns to death, he can’t swim in cold water or it’s death, when he gets hit, he falls down and it takes a while for him to get up.

There are some annoying enemies in the game because they are hard to beat or impossible for me to beat and it makes me waste weapons so I try to dodge them. I will go around them and if I don’t feel like fighting enemies, I will try and kill them cowardly by tossing bombs at them from above and I keep on doing it and watching them fly around and I sometimes will shoot arrows at them and they die instantly. i have killed a few Wizzrobes that way too. They get confused and just stand still for a few seconds so that gives me a chance to shoot an arrow at them. I do it from far away where they can’t see me and they are confused about where the arrows are coming from. I have also found ways to get on towers avoiding flying guardians and I have managed to climb Central Tower avoiding getting hit by a guardian. it took me like 20 minutes to get to the top. I just had to be patient and I had enough stamina to jump as I climbed up the tower and they get to another platform to rest and the guardians could no longer reach me or see me. Then I would climb more and they would aim at me again and I would be rushing to another platform. Then after the last platform they no longer aimed at me so I guess Nintendo decides to give the players a break after making it that far up. But once I start gliding from the tower, they aim at me again. And I would save every time I would make it to a new platform so that way if I died, I could load from that point. the game allows you to save any time and there are places where you aren’t allowed to save and start from where you exactly left off because you then find you have to start from the beginning despite saving and there are some places where you can’t save at all.

I told my husband about dodging enemies in the game and avoiding them and going around and also killing some of them cowardly and he laughed and said that is what Nintendo intended for me to do. It’s a strategy game so it makes you think and find a way to get to places. I spent most of my time climbing mountains and being a climber and gliding than taking pathways because they are mostly filled with enemies and that was how I reached towers that way too.

Now that I have done most of the Shrines and now I am at a point where you need to do Shrine challenges to unlock them and also I did all the dungeons so now I have the castle to do and I have collected over 100 Korok seeds and now I have lost interest in the game so I am not playing it much anymore. Just those guardians freak me out and there are too many of them in Hyrule field and in Hyrule town and Hyrule castle. Plus lot of tough enemies I have always dodged in the outer world. I even climbed up the wall to get to the castle and there were two guardians. I have ancient arrows though and I discovered I can use stasis to freeze them and then attack them. I also got the master sword. I have used it on Ganon in the dungeons and used them on mini guardians in shrines until energy runs out. Now I might just climb one of the pillars and then glide to the top of the castle and just go to Ganon so that way I am skipping lot of stuff and skipping all those enemies. But I have to make sure I get strong weapons first which can be found in the castle.

Now I am back to my Nintendo 3DS and I can get back to my story which I was supposed to finished before Easter and release on my forum for anyone to read. I had been so focused on it I didn’t do anything else online except using the walkthrough and watching some videos about how Ganon is defeated or how to do the Shrines or how to get rupees since you also don’t just get them from smashing things or killing enemies or cutting grass or bushes. There are only a few places like Goron village where you can get rupees from smashing jars or there is a certain enemy you can defeat and they always drop rupees and mighty bananas after you kill them. You just don’t find rupees often but I found most of them from treasure hunting and from selling rocks to a Gerudo in Goron Village and from completing some quests. There is no rupee limit either. There is also no item limit but there is a meal limit because after three pages of it, you can’t carry more. There is also a weapon limit and you collect Korok seeds to allow to carry more weapons or bows or shields.

How do they know?

Tuesday, April 4th, 2017

How does someone know they are asexual than knowing they haven’t met the right person yet or haven’t found a way to enjoy sex yet or because they are a late bloomer?

How does someone know they are gay/lesbian than because they are also a late bloomer and haven’t gotten into girls or boys yet?

How does someone know they are transgender than knowing they don’t want to follow the gender norms and because they just wish they were a man or a woman and want to have the same privilege of another gender?

How does someone know their brains or wired differently than thinking others struggle as much as they do?

How does someone know they are different than lot of people than knowing they only feel that way because they don’t have anything in common as their peers or the same interests?

Some people just know they are asexual or homosexual or transgender or bisexual or even know they have something like a disorder or a disability and some just know they function different and not like the others. Some even know they don’t want kids and knew that from a young age, not because they have no developed that interest yet and some just know they want to have kids because they want to, not because society tells them to and they are expected to have them. My uncle knew he liked boys when he was around eight years old. But he also knew it wasn’t “normal” so he kept it to himself and even tried being straight so he married a woman he loved and then she died from cancer and he decided to come out and started dating guys and met my uncle. Also how do some know being a man or woman have a feeling so they feel like so they know they are agender because they don’t feel either? Even some parents are naive to think if they can convince their children they are something, they will believe them and grow out of it and not live that way. Some even think they can keep their children from knowing they have something so they keep on telling them they’re normal and treat all their children the same so the child will never know they do have a disability and that they are different. My mom did that but yet they still know because I did. I still knew as a child and I guess my parents thought if they kept telling me I was normal, I will believe them and stop thinking I’m different. That didn’t work because I wasn’t dumb. Kids are smarter than adults realize. Kids know more than a parent realizes. I call that naive of what parents do. They think they can control what their kids can think but sometimes a child is smarter than that. A parent might try convincing their transgender child there is nothing wrong with them and they are a girl, not a boy but the son still knows he is not a girl despite what body he has. A parent might think if they let their “daughter” be a tomboy and do boy things and not not do gender norms and let their kids play with either boy or girl toys regardless of what gender they are, “she” might get over the fact that”she” is a boy and just accept “her” body. I have actually read that in articles about transgender and parents saying they thought if they could do this, their kid would get over it and they said they didn’t know because they thought it was a phase or thought their kid felt that way because of gender norms. Yes I call that naivety. It’s only transphobic if the parent was aware of the whole transgender thing and it appearing in young children but they ignore it and not consider it for their child so they stay in denial and just lie to themselves because they don’t want a transgender child. But for my parents I am sure they were only doing it to make me feel better than being abliest but I was too smart for it. Also my mother might have had her own definition of the word normal and a parent on youtube called her autistic child normal. She said he is normal but his brain just works different.