Must bottle my feelings again

Saturday, October 15th, 2016

Every time something is bothering me, I always have to talk about it because I can’t get it out of my head.

The drain was clogged again so I informed my parents about it. They took it as I wanted them to do something about it now.

I had to give my kids a bath and the drain wouldn’t drain nor would it close so they sort of had a bath thanks to the clogged drain. I had to make this quick because I wanted to shower and I hadn’t had one in three days. I wash their hair and I was going to let them play in the tub until all the water was drained out but they wouldn’t quit splashing around so I got them out and dried them off and got my daughter’s diaper back on her and put her nightie on her and put her to bed and then i took care of my son and put him to bed.

I couldn’t stop obsessing about the drain so I kept talking to my parents about it and I had all these worries like “what if it keeps getting worse” “What if it takes my parents a long time to fix it” “What if it takes them a long time to do it like they did about the kitchen sink” and my mom got mad at me about it when I said again “I can’t believe the drain is clogged again.”

I feel I must bottle my feelings up again and suffer with my own intrusive thoughts. I was cranky due to the anxiety and my husband came to my rescue by checking it out. He told me I had to turn it to make it go down and offered to show me. He went upstairs and tried to show me but the drain wouldn’t go down so he messed with it. I obsessed about it with him and then I went to the basement to get my clothes off and get my pajamas so I could shower.

Then I heard my husband calling my name and telling me to come up there. I told him I would in a minute because I am getting undressed and getting ready to take my shower.

I heard my husband coming back down while I was going upstairs and he told me he fixed it. I asked him what was the problem and he said he twisted the top off and took off the drain and it had a piece of plastic in there and it was all full of hair. It’s in the trash if I want to look at it. I looked at the trash and there was the pile of hair and I saw the piece if plastic and two pieces from a broken toy. the drain worked good as new again and all the anxiety and fears were gone.

I am so lucky to have my husband because he never gets mad at me for my anxiety and intrusive thoughts whenever something is bothering me. I don’t think my parents can handle it anymore because they just get defensive and upset with me so I have to hold it all in.



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