I was recently linked to a Twitter page on Reddit and I discovered people on there thinking personality disorders don’t exist and they are just made up for victims who went through trauma. I even found a blog from that Twitter page talking about how to manipulate the doctors to avoid a personality disorder label and how to get a different diagnoses instead. It tells you what to say and what not to talk about. I am not going to bother linking those pages because I don’t want the blogger to know I had posted their link here because WordPress does send you a notification you have been quoted or linked to another WordPress page and also I don’t want to direct any Twitter traffic to this page and have them see this post.
Also they don’t think BPD exists. They think they’re all just labels for victims but they had missed the point. People don’t get diagnosed with a personality disorder because they were a victim of trauma, they are labeled that way because of their unstable moods and emotions and how they handle their behavior and their personality and how much it holds them back and causes them an impairment in their daily functioning. Not all survivors get a personality disorder but I have read that a PD can be developed due to trauma but some people still get it without trauma. But I remember reading somewhere abused victims are more likely to develop unstable emotions and relationships and have unstable personalities. But isn’t the whole point in a diagnoses is to get the help and treatment they need? So they would go see a therapist that specializes in personality disorders but if they don’t think there is anything wrong with them, they won’t really get help for it.
But it did help me see their perspective about why they blame their problems on others and not take responsibility and why it’s always the other person’s fault and not theirs. It’s sad how they don’t believe in their own diagnoses and they think it’s just a label. Yes you were abused and it’s not your fault but you are responsible for how you handle it now and what to do with your present time now and you are responsible for your behavior. There are plenty of abused people out there who don’t go around mistreating others and abusing them. They might have PTSD but that is about it. BPD can be treated and recovered from I have read. NPD can be recovered from too but that seems to be very rare. You always have the choice to recover and get control of yourself. That is something I learned on Dr. Phil and even Sarah Burleton said something about it too when she wrote a blog post about lot of people blaming their problems on their parents. While it is true that people do have problems due to their past abuse or how their parents raised them, they still have the choice about what to do about their life now and to change it instead of continuing to be a victim and not do a thing about it.
I don’t doubt there are some people who are a victim of a label because misdiagnoses do happen and sometimes abusers will gaslight and manipulate a doctor and they end up diagnosing a patient with a disorder they don’t even have because they believed that person over a patient. Then that label follows that person and people take them less seriously because they look at the diagnoses and think this is what is going on and think they are having a symptom again and not take them seriously. Same thing happens with other disorders too like with autism or Bipolar or anxiety. Then those people have to deal with it in the doctor’s office. They might be told they are just having anxiety when they talk about their feelings or personal experience or just be told they are having a mood swing or they are just missing social cues so people are acting the way they are so they must be doing something socially inappropriate. Unfortunately I feel my mom does this to me about my anxiety, everything is always anxiety. In high school I felt I couldn’t make any mistakes without it being called Asperger’s. I think the same thing can happen with OCD. If you like things neat and organized and get upset when other people don’t keep it that way, everyone blames it on the OCD and uses it to justify to not take you seriously. But if you have autism, people are more likely to follow your rules but if it’s OCD, it’s oh no you have to face your compulsion to fight it. But what if you just like things neat and organized and it has nothing to do with any anxiety and distress and any magical thinking, you just like it that way? But with OCD, people might just blame it on that and not take it seriously because they think that is just the OCD talking. I think I can understand what those people with PD’s are saying who don’t believe in that diagnoses, they feel invalidated when it’s blamed on a disorder and it affects how doctors treat them because of the diagnoses on their file. Instead of treating them like human like how they would treat anyone else with trauma without that diagnoses, they treat them differently.
There is a very bad stigma on personality disorders no one wants to have it so why would they want that diagnoses? Instead it’s so much better to have autism or anxiety or PTSD or OCD or Bipolar or schizophrenia and have it not be your fault but when you have a PD, it’s all your fault. PD’s are not treated the same as mental illnesses by doctors and society. Even people will say Ted Bundy was not mentally ill even though he was labeled as being a narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder but in my opinion anyone who likes killing people and getting a pleasure out of it is sick. But because he was a cold blooded killer, everyone just wants him to be evil than someone who was mentally ill and had a disorder that made him evil. No one wants murder to be linked to a mental illness so no one wants any killers to be mentally ill and if they have a personality disorder, no one wants it to be a mental illness so it’s often treated separately. No one wants to have sympathy for anyone with a personality disorder so they don’t see it as a mental illness even though they are one. Even victims don’t want their abusers to have a mental illness or some neurological disorder, they would rather have them have a personality disorder or else it would mean it’s not their fault and it’s the victim’s fault.
So I think I can see what those people are saying about PD’s and how it invalidates them. But then again they are still responsible, everyone is responsible regarding what disorder they have including non personality disorders. But no one is responsible for the abuse they went through as a child.