What gives me anxiety

Sunday, March 27th, 2016

I get anxiety when things don’t go my way

I get anxiety when things don’t go the way I planned or expected it

I get anxiety when something is on my mind and it can’t be fixed right now

I get anxiety over change in plans

I get anxiety from stress

I get anxiety from my children because of their screeching and screaming and them not listening to me and because my son asking if he can get this or that and whining and crying and not listening to me and not taking no for an answer

I get anxiety when my kids make too much noise and cause chaos and fight

I even get anxiety from too many interruptions and when I can’t be alone and have down time

I get anxiety when I feel I am not in control and when I feel my life is out of control

I get anxiety over prices going up like in bills which is why my husband handles the finances

I get in anxiety about the unknown and when I don’t know what to expect

I get anxiety about things not getting done due to limited time

I get anxiety when I am uncomfortable and forced to be in that situation and I can’t get out of it

Dog pee indoors in my own home gives me anxiety which is why we don’t have any pets because I don’t want to toilet train it

Having too much to do gives me anxiety because it’s all thrown at me at once and it takes me out of my routine

Being bored gives me anxiety when I have been waiting for too long

I get anxiety when my stuff gets touched too much and moved around

I once got anxiety when I couldn’t find the TV remote because I always watch Dr. Phil when I get home from work and then someone took the TV remote again and I got anxiety about it because someone took the TV remote and you can’t turn the TV on without it or even watch the show without it because it’s on TIVO

I get anxiety when I get upset
My anxiety has nothing to do about worry or fear. My anxiety is unusual but yet I have anxiety disorder, diagnosed. I don’t fit into either anxiety label so it would be anxiety disorder NOS but mine is only listed as Anxiety disorder. And I wonder how autism spectrum disorders works without anxiety because aren’t they having anxiety when their routine changes or when a room changes or the menu or things in a store or when their plans get disrupted or when they are interrupted due to difficultly with transition and don’t they get it from not being able to stim and do their repetitive behaviors and don’t they get it from sensory issues? So why don’t they have an anxiety disorder too like I do? Didn’t Rain Man have anxiety when his brother was trying to force him get on a airplane because he believed they were dangerous to fly? if you try and force him to be in a situation he felt was unsafe, he would freak out so wouldn’t that have been anxiety he was having? I believe Max Beaverman has anxiety too like me because of the way he reacts and when he gets upset and he acts just like me except he is more of a textbook aspie. It would be surprised if he also didn’t have anxiety. Even Frankie had anxiety too so he got anxiety when he lost the game Shy Guy Says in one of the Mario Party games because he raised up the right blag but the game made him raise up the wrong flag so he lost and he got upset. He once got anxiety when their family dog wouldn’t stay in a certain spot in the pick up truck while we were going to the lake so he kept shouting at the dog.

Right now I have my Wells Fargo credit card on my mind, it got hacked a couple weeks back and they sent us a new one with a whole new number on it and I found out today it did come but now it’s lost. I am so upset and I had anxiety and was having a hard time talking and breathing and it upsets me so much when people touch my mail and move it and don’t give it to us. i never saw it in the kitchen and I had looked in the mail box always for that mail and I never saw it. this is what happens when you live with other people in your home such as your parents so I don’t always see all my stuff that comes in the mail and I just wish it would be kept in one spot or be taken to our room and set on the table or chair. It never comes natural for us to check our mail because it’s like remembering to check your tire pressure. Back in Montana it was no issue because I always checked it when coming back from work and it was my routine. I need to try and make it a routine again but it’s hard when the mail man never comes at the same time and when my dad always checks it so it’s impossible for that routine and I do not like to make a routine only for it to change and then I have anxiety because it gets disrupted so my life is chaotic without one. I do always give the mail to my husband and set it on his computer when anything comes for us when I do see it on the counter.


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