I am the one who feels annoyed when I read about anyone letting their parents ruin their lives and telling them what to do or even allowing them in their life when their parent is so toxic. Honestly if my in laws were toxic and my husband was listening to them and it was affecting our relationship because he still went by their orders and following their rules and letting their views affect his decisions, I would be gone. I wouldn’t want to take the drama and my husband being mama’s boy or daddy’s boy.
My mom isn’t toxic but I still let her tell me what to do as if I am a child. I feel I don’t have the balls to stand up. Just today while I was watching The Dark Net, my son came in my room and right away he starts to whine. I hate that tone of voice, whining. He right away says “water” and I point to the cup that is sitting on my dresser that is his and it still has juice in it from days ago. I tell him the cup is right there and to pour it out and fill it up. He starts to cry. Then he starts whining “Juice” and I tell him to pour it in the sink first and he cries and cries and I tell him to pour it in the sink. My mom then yells at me from her bedroom saying he wanted to be with me and to not push him away. I wasn’t pushing him away, I just wanted him to dump the old juice out. But apparently having my son dump it in the sink is so wrong. So I say out loud being passive aggressive to my mother, “I guess I will dump the juice out for you” to my son. I take the cup and take it to the kitchen and dump it out and then I rinse it and put new juice in it. Then I put the juice away and bring it up to my son. His whining magically stopped. Is it also wrong to not give into my son if he is whining? I will push him away when he whines because all I am hearing is the whining and I can’t function with that racket and also giving into him when he whines just teaches him to whine to get his way right? And here I am letting my mother telling me how to parent. Why must I be weak?
Also was him saying he wanted water and then juice his way of wanting to be with me and I didn’t get that hint? Why didn’t he just say he wanted to be with me than asking for something to drink?